The Boston College Center for Work & Family studied nearly 1,000 American fathers with the results showing that these fathers care deeply about their work and their families, but struggle to be active, engaged parents while investing significant energy in successful careers. Overcoming these struggles requires give and take and almost always sacrifices, but there are proven benefits.
I recently left my full time job at a Fortune 500 company. This decision was prompted by the need to stop the train, take a look around and determine my next career direction. I'll preface the remainder of this entry to say that no joke, it is not easy to stay at home with three children full time, I understand why my wife's alternate personality "Margaret" would greet me at the door (at times pulling a cork out of a wine bottle with her teeth), I didn't get it then, I completely get it now. Never underestimate the amount of work it takes to operate a home and care for the children, never.
Call it a form of "Freaky Friday" but the transition of sole breadwinner to my wife was a major switch for both of us and at times challenging for many reasons. I took "working from home" to a whole new level. Initially my homecare activities would be rewarded with 6-7 hours of free time, certainly well worth the craze at the start and end of the day. However, once summer came, and school released all the children, the free time dwindled to almost nil. Now this is an entirely different story. Still, I am grateful for this experience and certainly thank my lovely wife for her support and understanding.
Even while working full time, I always made it a priority to be part of my children's activities. In my case, in order to do so, I know I sacrificed career opportunities; this was however, a conscious decision. I believe that the formative years is the time to be involved in the children and their activities. This involvement early on in life will have tremendous positive effects on the child's future socially and developmentally. Now that the children have a solid base, I can apply clear focus on my career.
In accordance with a key finding in the BCCWF study, not only does this interaction benefit the children, my participation in activities involving coaching sports, or educational activities all contribute to personal skill development that can transfer to the workplace, skill development does not only happen in the workplace.
Another key finding in the Boston College study states fathers reported that work caused more conflict with family life than family life caused conflict with work. The key contributor is the lack of full acceptance of flexible work arrangements (FWA); flex time, work from home, compressed work week. The continual evolution and acceptance of FWA, will reduce the amount of this conflict between family life and work. A catalyst to this change will certainly be the increased development and advancement of networking and productivity tools and the fact that future generations, for example Gen Y, will continue to join the work force, altering the traditional workplace as we know it.
The reduction in the struggle between family and work is possible, but will require give and take and almost always sacrifices but will pay off with proven benefits.
